Monday, January 01, 2007

Happy New Year

A new year. It's raining. I love rain on a morning when I don't have to do anything. It helps me sleep in, makes me feel warm and safe.

* * *
I'm not into making resolutions. I started my exercise/weight loss program in early December 2005, so I suppose that was my big change for 2006. I lost 50 pounds. I've gained a couple back in the last month which is depressing, but I have made a lot of excuses (family holidays, lunch at work with friends, etc.) I need to be more realistic on how far I can go on those "exceptions." Last night, for example, I went to dinner with friends and ate a good rich meal. That should have been enough but instead, I came home and helped myself to frozen yogurt and then some chips and then more wine. Because I knew I wasn't counting calories for the day (too complicated due to the dinner) so I could pretend that none of it counted. That kind of circular thinking is dangerous.

My goal this year is to go on at least one date. That sounds pitiful but I'm at the stage where meeting one new guy socially would be a big deal. Even with my half-hearted attempt at online dating (a quickly written profile and still no photo) there is one guy who sent me his email address. He looks like a nice guy, is a bit older, but seems okay. It dawned on me that I could answer and actually wind up meeting him and maybe it wouldn't be so bad. We might wind up with nothing in common but it would still be a big step to get out there (wherever "there"is.) Someday I'll write about my one online-dating experience so far. (I know, I keep dangling that carrot, but I don't have the energy to get into it today. He was a real scary case.) **

* * *
There's a whole new social dynamic in communications, which puts me at a loss. Several of my friends/family only have cell phones, no "land lines," which means that you don't have to figure out when they are likely to be home when you call, because, of course, you can always reach them. But that doesn't mean that every time you call is a good time to chat, because they aren't just sitting at home with time to talk, but can be on line at the grocery store or driving down a highway or pushing a kid on a swing in the park. I always feel like I'm interrupting, although they have control over whether to answer or not. I suppose it's the same as it ever was - when you call them at their house they could be washing dishes or doing yoga or taking a nap, but somehow it feels different. Maybe because I personally don't like talking on my cell phone in public (having overheard too many weirdly personal things from passersby) so I don't like being on the other end of a call in the same situation.

I bring this up because yesterday was someone's birthday and I knew that she was away for the weekend so didn't make my usual birthday call. I meant to leave a message on her home voice mail but forgot. This morning I realized that "Oh I knew you weren't home so didn't call" is silly because I could have always reached her on her cell phone.

* * *
I could lie around all day in bed and listen to the splashing of puddles as cars pass by my windows. I have to turn in a story to my writing group by Wednesday, and this is the prime time to get it done, although my usual procrastinating nature (procrastinature? I like that) means I'm more likely to be sitting here Wednesday night finalizing it. It's harder for me right now because my usual process is to write a draft longhand, type it into a Word document (while expanding on it), print out the Word doc and hand-write edits and changes, and go back to the computer. Unfortunately the loss of USB connections means I can't print at home, so I can only work on it right here, which stifles me a bit. (I've done some of my best revisions standing on a subway car or sitting in a park.) Twice this weekend I've gone to the Tea Lounge with my laptop, but it's been really crowded this weekend and will definitely be more so today because of the rain.

I have my main character walking into a hotel bar to meet her husband for dinner during a business conference. She witnesses him talking to a female colleague, before he notices she has walked in, and immediately knows that he is having an affair, just by his expression, body language, etc. I'm just a few paragraphs away from completing this section but am moving really slowly because I don't want it to be too schmaltzy, which is an obvious pitfall.

* * *
I planned on the gym today, although it would mean I've gone all three days of this weekend, (my usual pattern is two days on, one day off) but I would prefer tomorrow to be my day off. I dread the influx of well-meaning New Year's resolutioners who vow to start using that gym membership they've been paying all year, and flock to the gym in droves. I'm not sure which day will be worse - today, which is the first, but also likely a day when people will sleep in, or tomorrow, which would be the symbolic start of a new week/routine.

And a movie. I'd like to see something else - "Dreamgirls," because I saw it Friday afternoon, seems so long ago.

** Funny, I can't link directly to that post because it's a new month and archives are by month, not date of entry. I did a search to find it but once I put the search string into this blog, this blog suddenly contains the search string also so it's also becomes a result! Talk about circular reasoning. The carrot-dangling reference is to the second post on that page, titled Wimp


Blogger madabandon said...

I feel exactly as you do regarding cell phones. My friends and family wonder why I am so taciturn when they call me on my cell phone. But the reality is I can't bear to indulge in a personal conversation when I am out in public, because hearing others do so makes me want to scream.

10:38 AM  

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