What I hate about my apartment

It always feels dirty. It's an old building, with an owner that doesn't bother to take care of it. My apartment was "renovated" before I moved in, but that was almost 15 years ago, and the appliances, fixtures, and cabinets were used and/or cheaply made. Walls and trim were painted over years of layers of paint, so everything is globby and uneven. And since that was 15 years ago, what was done is worse for the wear. The wood floors could use a good refinishing. The electrical outlets are sparse and some are not functional.

I've painted almost every room in the years I've lived here, trying to freshen it up. But I don't want to invest time or money into hiring a professional to strip and sand the trim or the window sills (which are cracked and rotting.) I don't want to pay an electrician out of my own pocket, or find a way to shove my furniture into one room to make way for a floor sander. As a renter who has no intention of staying here forever, none of these things make sense.

I want to start over in a new home, a place where repairs and upkeep will get done, because they'll be my responsibility, and where I won't mind putting elbow grease and cash into improvements.

Another Sunday, another disappointing open house. Everything is too small or too far away or up too many flights of stairs. I keep trying to imagine compromising on one of these variables: a large beautiful apartment far from everything, including the subway? a beautiful apartment in a prime neighborhood in a great building, with all the amenities, but not enough room for me, my books, and my piano? a gorgeous, reasonably sized apartment, nicely located, but up five flights of stairs?

Keep looking.